Pillow Talk

 

I'd like to say a few words about pillows. I would venture to say that the vast majority of us use one every night. With that in mind, I would like to ask, do you like your pillow? Does it provide you with the comfort you expect, and can you get a good night's sleep with it? 

 

The reason I'm asking is I haven't had a good pillow in years. Every night I have a battle with mine. Oh, it starts the night out pretty much OK. I use two pillows to prop up in bed for reading, but then remove the one and sleep on the primary pillow. Frankly, it's a little bit too fat and it elevates my head more than I like. Sometimes in the morning I awaken with a sore neck  or a headache. It still beats the Puffy pillow that came with my Puffy mattress. Puffy. What the hell kind of a name is Puffy for a mattress? Its not really puffy or fluffy-wuffy. Its kind of stiff and stuffy. Anyway, I'm writing about pillows, not mattresses.

 

In any event, I wake up several times during the night to go pee. Inevitably, I notice when I wake up that the pillow is hot. Maybe my fat head is generating mass amounts of heat while I'm dreaming. All those thoughts drifting around inside might create friction, I don't know. I wonder if dreams about sex create more heat than ones about the work place? I should check on that.

 

I've read about cooling pillows, but I don't think they really work; maybe I'm wrong. I just hate to go spend a bunch more money on pillows that don't do what they say  they'll do. I tried one of those My Pillow pillows once at a friend's house. She had taken some of the fill out, and it was still too fat. Don't get me wrong, I hate pillows that, after you've laid on them for five minutes, become flatter than a pancake at Ihop. Some years back I had a pillow that was perfect. I used it for ten or so years until it finally gave up the ghost. I think it was a feather pillow or a combination feather and foam, I don't know. I tried to find a replacement, but there was none to be found. Since then I've searched high and low, but haven't discovered a great pillow yet. 

 

Yesterday I was looking for pillows on-line. Good Lord, some of those things are almost a hundred bucks! Some are shaped just for side-sleepers, some for folks who sleep on their backs, and some for stomach sleepers. I've seen some that resemble horseshoes and some are better suited for reading in bed. I'm afraid to order anything on-line and then find out it's not what I want. It doesn't seem to matter which brand you look up, there will be dozens of folks who like that particular brand. Go figure.

 

I decided to do a little research on the history of pillows. I discovered they have been around a long time. They were first used in Mesopotamia about 7,000 B.C.  They weren't invented with comfort in mind either. They were made out of carved stone and were meant to elevate the head so that insects wouldn't crawl into your mouth, nose or ears. Apparently they were expensive, so only the wealthy could afford them.  I guess the poor folks had to accept  a nightly invasion of their cranial cavities by bugs.

 

According to this article, ancient Egyptians also used pillows, but for a different purpose. They believed the head was the seat of spiritual life and should be cherished. They used marble, ivory, ceramic, wood or stone. Some Egyptians carved their pillows with images of the Gods to keep bad spirits away. I wonder how that worked, waking up in the morning with the image of Rah imprinted on the back of your bald head. Sexy!

 

The Chinese were advanced enough to create textile pillows, but they also believed that soft pillows would sap your strength. They preferred hard pillows made of bamboo  or porcelain. If that's the case, why invent soft pillows? Another mystery to contemplate some day.

 

Apparently King Henry VII banned soft pillows for whatever reason. He was probably as frustrated as I am trying to find a good pillow. Eventually though, by the 16th century, they were back. Unfortunately the stuffing had to be changed often because of mold and mildew issues and vermin. How would you like to put your head on your pillow in anticipation of a good night's sleep and it starts to move? Gross!

 

In the 1960's polyester was invented, and since then, it seems to be the standard fill for pillows. You can still buy feather pillows, and I think you can get them with feathers and polyester fill. There is also buckwheat and lavender pods available. You know, I'm 74 years old. Before I die, I'd like to find a pillow that really meets my needs. I don't think that's asking too much. I just hope the one that works doesn't come with a coffin.