Wilderness Blues- Ramblings from the Great Land

  I came down to the office the other day and opened up my email. I scanned through the usual stuff, most of which was of no interest to me whatsoever. Then I saw I had an email from ED Trick. That's a weird name. Who the hell is ED Trick, and what does he want? I don't know anyone named Ed. The last guy named Ed that I knew was a family friend who died years ago. It finally dawned on me that this was an advertisement for E D- not education- Erectile Dysfunction. What the heck? Why are they sending me this message? I've never asked about it. Frankly, I don't need it, and if I did, I wouldn't be inquiring about it on the internet. I guess because I'm old now, they naturally assume that I'm still interested in sex, which I have to admit I am, and that I need some help, which I don't. Aside from that, whose business is it anyway? I think its weird that nothing is off limits now, even on TV. If you fart a blue streak, there is a pill for that, and a commerci...

The other day my wife, Jan decided we needed a new toilet seat. I'm not sure why. The old one worked just fine, no splinters or anything, but nonetheless, she didn't like it, so we're now sporting a new one. With my arthritic back and knees, I was thinking that if it hasn't already been invented, a hydraulic toilet seat would really be nice. When you were done with your business, as soon as you flushed, the hydraulic rams would automatically kick in and lift your behind right off the potty. No doubt it's the next billion dollar idea.   I spent ten years at a farm here in Alaska where there were no indoor toilets. We all had some manner of honey bucket in our homes for use during the night. As I've mentioned before, I never really had to avail myself of those once we built our house out in the woods. My closest human neighbor was over a block away, and the squirrels, deer, martens, bears and other woodland creatures never lodged a complaint...