Friday, March 16, 2012

Chicken Bras

I'm at a bit of a standstill on the boat right now. I have one project that requires me to lay on the frozen ground that I have been delaying, but other than that there isn't a whole lot that I can do at the moment.Since I was home anyway, and the place looked like I'd thrown a party for twenty wild dogs, I decided to clean up a little bit. I threw in a load of laundry and put some dishes in the dishwasher and started into my office where countless papers were littering every flat surface. I was tossing stuff madly into the trash when I came across the words-chicken bras scratched on a slip of paper.I had read that when writing, one should write down ideas, even in the middle of the night. If you can't use them now, they may come in handy later.I can't remember if I was in the middle of some erotic, Salvadore Dahli type dream or what, but for some unknown reason, the thought of chicken bras came to mind sometime in my past, so I wrote it down. We eat a fair amount of chicken- usually breast meat. Whenever I go to Costco I usually buy one or two multi-packs.Sometimes the breasts are unusually large- which may be why the thought of constraining them came to mind, I honestly don't know. Before anyone gets any strange ideas about me, believe me, I have no desire to see a Rhode Island Red prancing down the runway modeling the latest in chicken lingerie at a Victoria's Secret show. Much like the idea of the Dog-Mote, I felt like the chicken bra idea needed to be put out there to see if I've got a money making scheme or if I should put it back in the- not ready for prime time file. I didn't want to be totally unprepared to write this post, so I did a MINOR amount of research on the bra.Honestly. I don't  think Jan would appreciate my spending hours researching all the intimate details of ladies undergarments, regardless of how scientific the study might be. I did discover that a lady named Mary Phelps Jacob is credited with making the first bra. Apparently the corset she had didn't work with her fancy gown, so she sewed a few handkerchiefs together with some silk ribbon and there you go, the bra was born. I understand that Minoan women used some semblance of a bra back in 2500 BC, but fashion designs changed and modern women didn't care to have their breasts exposed, so it didn't take off here. It was probably warmer there anyway.  I remember watching a Seinfeld episode where George's father took off his shirt in front of Cramer and the bra for men was invented. They were having an argument as to whether it should be named the Manzierre or the Bro. I've known a few guys who could benefit from a garment like that. I hope I don't find myself in need some day. It could be hard to live-down in the locker room, trying to explain why you needed the extra support.

8 comments:

  1. Should I send down some chocolate chips to compelete the look of those breasts?

    ReplyDelete
  2. Thanks for the offer Autumn, but I'll pass. I think we have some in the cupboard.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Psst..Autumn..you know he went and grabbed said chocolate chips outta the cupboard as soon as he wrote that response;-) I would love to know just what the heck was goin through your mind when you scratched the words "chicken bra" down...or..on second though..maybe I'd rather not;-) Great blog though...always like gettin caught up...still enjoy going back to the beginning posts and rereading..always makes me laugh...love you dad..AJ

    ReplyDelete
  4. Hi Amber- I think I had pulled a package of chicken breasts out of the freezer and was impressed by how large they were. It was all down hill from there. My mind is a mysterious place, even for me. I've just learned to go with it and see where I end up. Love you too.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Wow, bro-in-law, you REALLY need to get off that island once in awhile...:)!!

    ReplyDelete
  6. Hi Todd- I'm still laughing while I write this- that was too funny! I've been to beaches where I've been emberassed for some of the guys I've seen waltzing through the sand. I guess if it doesn't bother them it shouldn't bother me.
    Hey Jill- I guess my family must be in agreement-I assume that's why they came together and provided the tickets to the Yanni concert. I'm really glad I don't post every strange thought that glides by on the brain waves. I have to admit, sometimes what passes through my mind surprizes even me.

    ReplyDelete
  7. haaahahaha...large chicken breasts...now THAT is amusing..hmm..perhaps they have a Chicktorias Secret for those over-endowed chicks...A B-cup, Todd? Lucky bastard! K....sorry..allowing my negative A jealousy to get to me...love ya dad...

    ReplyDelete